Wednesday, February 8, 2012

after the order of melchizedek

You are certainly right in assuming that this model is devoid
of any after-market cus-to-mi-za-tions
(and when you say that, please make sure that you pronounce that correctly, sweetie-pants)
This particular model comes complete with the white collar 
that is so de-rigeur,
and even his own private breviary (slightly worn).
If you would like, we could have the technician down in the shop tune him up,
and have his emissions checked.
But no, he is devoid of any after-market cus-to-mi-za-tions 
such as we all desire.
He comes to you just as he came from the factory
(with the addition of a little sacramental grace
and some stress-related wear. A little too much cholesterol 
and some slight pains in his chest.
OK, maybe a bad back and some breathing difficulties.
Gout. OK, there is that touch of gout.
And you should get him to a dermatologist 
to see if that patch is malignant.
And the arthritis. Did I mention the arthritis?)
Never mind, though, he is a fine specimen, 
and he does come with his very own breviary.
I could throw in a couple of extra collars,
One “Roman style” one “Anglican style,”
(just to keep the poor man confused)
and one of those ratcheting tightening devices.
But again, he is devoid of any after-market cus-to-mi-za-tions.
A stock model, you might say.
He should have a few good miles left in him
and he can say Mass in less than 30 minutes,
and if you keep him well-tuned 
then I do believe dear Mrs. O'Malley will not wince
when he sings the sursum corda.

But as I said, 
he is devoid of any after-market cus-to-mi-za-tions.

Perhaps you would like to look at last season's 
Orthodox model instead?
...less time at the therapist 
and you don't need to replace razor blades,

but still lacking those after-market cus-to-mi-za-tions.

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